I have done many JCP, all but two of them as a Domme. I have always had 'the fear' before the day, building up until the moment I am secured and waiting for punishment. Nothing worried me quite as much as the Singapore cane. I have never tasted it before but I know the pain it emits is a dull thud and not the sting I love and crave. For this reason I was convinced I would, for the first time, not make it to the other end in one piece. I was in some was correct.
The prisoners were Ellen-May Davis, Nicky Montford, Slayer, SJ, and myself. We were ushered into a side room, isolated from the audience and the other girls and instructed to change into our prison uniforms. They were ugly, and nothing I did made them look the least bit attractive. That, combined with my lack of make up (I had good reason for this, read on!) meant that my usual 'Leia' mask was not there to protect me. I had nowhere to hide. After what seemed an eternity the officers came to collect the first meeting. It was me. We were not aware of the order of play, so there was no way to psychologically prepare for the 'moment'. feeling unprepared for what was to come, I was taken outside to face the officers. The cold hit me, and that combined with the nerves, made me shake uncontrollably. When asked the routine health questions I could hardly answer for the fear coursing through my veins.
Secured onto the H frame I had just a few seconds to calm myself while Miss Switch took aim. Nothing, but nothing could have prepared me for what was to come. The pain on my buttocks from each COUNTED (a stroke had to be clean and not hit the padding at all) stroke was unbearable. It seared into my flesh and I had no way of processing it. Within 3-4 strokes I was screaming and crying like never before. I had built myself up for this event, and yet I felt that somehow I had under-estimated the implement I had signed up for. By strokes 10-12 I was crying uncontrollably, despite the presence of an audience (believe me I am not one for showing my hand in front of people!), in fact I am not sure I even remembered they were there, such was the depth of the scene both emotionally and physically. It was only at stroke 14 that I realised I could do this and I did have the strength to suffer all 18 strokes. When stroke 18 hit me I knew I had done it. But the tears still came and did not stop for a good 10 minutes after my punishment was over. I had been broken, by CP alone. Never has this happened before and never have I let go so easily in front of a crowd of people in such a manner. I could not watch anyone else, I could not bear to see others potentially go through that which I had gone through. I do know I was not the only lady to break, Ellen-May and I also shared a hug after her scene. It was an unforgettable day at a fantastic venue in Kent, where the location allows for more adventurous play, in this case an outdoor scene I will never forget.
I really need to thank Mistress Switch for having me as one of the subjects and administering my first 9 searing strokes, Mr A for some fantastic after-care and a good long hug after my punishment and Miss S for her part in administration of the Singapore. A GREAT day!!!
Now, I know the venue is not easy to get to, but believe me it was worth it. To be able to play outside is really quite special, and not something that can be done easily in London. Sometimes it is worth while to leave the Capital to try something new and different.