Hello folks. I do apologise for the long delay in posting but I have been VERY busy, which is one of the reasons for this post.
I have had quite a schedule of late, balancing scene play with chemistry work with mixed success. I recently scheduled a deeply psychological play session (private) where I would be tested in physicality as well as in mind. I knew I had a busy schedule previous to this event, but I ignored this and went along to the event, despite by brain feeling like it had been run over by a truck several times. Physically I was not too bad, but mentally I was shattered. Given what I am (I will not go into the details), I really need to look after my mind more than I do. So why don't I? Well, logic gives in to the need to play. Sadly, this often means that the play session I have been so looking forward to is not so good for me or the person I am playing with. What is usually hot can become less so, and certain subjects that are sore (and can possibly be used in a session to 'break' me) become mountains rather than mole hills. The session was not all bad, please do not misunderstand me (in fact we traversed a major rubicon), but I could have been so much better and so given my play partner so much more.
After the session, I felt low, possibly because I was so emotionally tired, but also because I had not performed as well as I felt I should have. This is counter-productive for all involved I believe. This may be why I am no longer a slave! Has anyone else suffered from 'logic giving way to need' syndrome? I do hope I am not the only one but please leave comments if you have anything to say on this matter. Thank you folks!
5 comments:
perhaps you are evolving. i am fascinated with, what age and experience does to your mind. i always and still am a spanker but maybe being a spankee can be fun to!
getting the balance between professional life and private life is difficult for most,particularly with your situation. So (its easy to say) just do not burn fuel you do not have and just slow down a bit, silly cow! :^)
KeepBloggin
does multiple post fuck up diminish my integrity?
(it should be easier)
Hey, I am evolving, but I still have a deep need for my submissive side, perhaps more so now that I have other aspects to me. It is difficult to get the balance right, and sometimes I take on too much. I will, promise!
Thank you lovely xxx
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